Awal Lagi

This is my second time. Feel miserable and stupid to fall in the same hole twice. Harus mulai dari awal lagi. Actually I believe (always believe) that I can’t survive without someone who can guide me. I need a guide, or a map at least.

But sometimes I also asked myself why do I need other person to settle things that i ruin? Why?
Is that because I lack of confidence? Or do I really don’t know how to fix it? I guess the answer is I don’t have the courage to even realize that I’m in a big trouble.
Now, come to think of it I try to manage my mind by waking my inner-self up. To open my eyes that if I don’t settle this now this mistake will be haunting me for the next coming future (if I have any future left). Sad reality. Reality is sad, my dear! But that’s what we call life. We struggle, we try, then we struggle again, then we try again. If we succeed that’s what you can be grateful of. If you failed, you can’t be less grateful. God knows best how to pay your hard work.

In the middle of sorrowfulness,

06092017

 

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